i know.i'm glad i do.

Cand ai cu adevarat pe cineva? in pat dupa un orgasm sau inainte? cand o tii de mana pe aleea unui parc? cand plangi ca si cum nu te vede nimeni la ea in brate? cand cand cand ?!
Eu cred,ca ai pe cineva atunci ca acea persoana nu mai poate pleca de langa tine..si sa ramana aceeasi persoana. Cred ca asa sunt persoane pe care nu o sa le aiba nimeni in nici un fel(ceea ce e foarte trist) dar si ca poti pierde persoane.

Se poate intampla sa spui ca ai pierdut pe cineva,dar sa insemne ca ai pierdut-o din tine,iar cealalta persoana va zice ca te-a pierdut. De fapt, probabil ca v-ati pierdut.

Insa e mai bine sa pierzi pe cineva,decat sa nu ai ce pierde.

Dar cel mai bine e sa nu pierzi pe nimeni. If only...

windshield.

i'm stuck on moments. i see it as a recurring idea in everything i begin to write or think.
moments. i lately started to belive that everything is about a moment. everything has been defined in a moment. we maybe see something as a dynamic process over a period of time, but in reality, what started the 'something' is a moment.

think about a war. the world war II lasted for a couple of years. but the war itself started in a moment of madness ,maybe in hitler's bed when he was 20. that moment definied his actions and all we lived[well, not we but the people who lived it] is the consequence of that moment. sure, he made it happen that's another story.

think about happiness. i used to think that happiness is a momentary state. i am happy now. i'm ok tomorow, not happy. i'll be happy again. but looking at this theory from my new point of view, i understand that happiness can be a permanent or at least continuously state but it is definied by a moment. something inside was touched and changed and generated this intense feeling of happiness. all you feel afterwards is a consequence. and that's maybe the beauty of it.

same with love. i know that people say(and in english is this very good construction) "i've grown to love her/him" for exemple. but it's not like one day you loved someone less, the other more and more until u hit the jackpot. everything was a forplay. a forplay for the moment when loved really emerged.

maybe it's silly. but that's what i think and i live and die by moments. and when i feel i just happend to had one,i'm really interested to feel,live and see the consequences of the moment.

and i'm so dissapointed to see it wasted.

and because i can't.

i can't get everything done my way. i can't act anyway and suppose to get my results. i can't get away with it. and i'm happy for that. let's just hope that because of it i'll get someplace where i can really appreciate what i have. keep what it's good for me. and stop making stupid things and stop taking stupid decisions.

this way.maybe i'll stop kicking myself all the time.

cause it hurts...

[ track marilyn manson - heart shapped glass ]

crepuscular

inca o noapte si inca o zi. inca o zi ramasa pana la final.ce bine ca se termina. e trist ca se termina. dar cel mai trist e ca de fapt nu se termina niciodata...

inca o noapte si inca o zi. inca o shaorma efeminizata si o plimbare pe strazi .ce bine e sa nu ai probleme. ce rau e ca ai. si ce foarte rau ca o sa ai tot timpul..

ultima noapte.si intaia zi. din noua ta viata. de maine,de maine, iti spui....de maine sa fie...

[ track - Black Moon - looking down the barrel ]

no particular someone...

essence of time. what's that?

what exactly do u want from me? what can i promise??? nothing! that's what. we're not designed for long term baby, it's all short term . that's the definition of human. s-h-o-r-t t-e-r-m. oh yeah, sometimes one of us raise from ashes and mediocrity and build smth that will last for what we'd reffer as long term...and we all look at it with confused feelings of humiliation,jelousy, pride...yeah. but tell u what. not even that. not EVEN what the greatest of our man can do last that long...it's just alot for us...

so what can i say?

it's all for nothing...but let's pray for something. and when everything else fails. no problem...

we can always live for today. as there is no tomorow. and that way...we'll have an eternity catched in one moment.

so dance with me baby.today.tonite.and forever.

the patience..

... to wait the sweetest second, and so to make it even sweeter.

... to make the little steps, those who take u to the greatest victory.

... to see what holds tomorow, but to live for today.

... to fight the urge, and find the right time.

... to hope for better times,the joy that they came.

... to stay for the sunrise, and the magic attached.

and the unpatience for the day you'll have this patience....:)